Friday, November 20, 2009

I am Jack's crippling fear of social networking

I love stalking writing blogs.

Everyone, really: authors, unpublished authors, people with day jobs who write on the side, agents, editors, people that know GOBS about successful writing and even people who don't know much but are willing to spout links nonetheless . . . it's frankly addicting. I could click for years. Or at least hours. Interspersed with a couple comics and some boingboing. And there goes my afternoon.

Sometimes it's because I truly want to learn more, really. There's nothing in this world I'd rather do professionally except write (and draw pictures . . . and eat chocolate while doing so) for a living, despite the fact I find writing difficult, oftentimes daunting, depressing and . . . hard. (DANG) No, not all the time. A great deal of the time it can be downright delightful (YES I LOVE ALLITERATION) but there's no denying I struggle with it from time to time. These said writing blogs are a stellar way to connect with other such writers, snuffling tears and fears of rejection and---even better--- rejoicing in one another's triumphs.

Every other day, I think to myself: "I should really get into this. There's stuff to be said, stuff I should get people's opinions on. No more lurking. I should comment. I should send out emails. Connect with these people: MY PEOPLE. This is my clan!! Why am I not connecting with my clan?" Then, as it happens every time I use the word "clan" in my internal thoughts, I start thinking about Highlander. Then I think to myself: "I should watch me some Highlander." And before I know it, I'm off the blogs, staring at my unfinished manuscript and listening to Queen in the background. Internet ADD is no writer's friend, kids.

Perhaps it comes from my crippling fear of social networking. I love being a facebook/blog/forum voyeur, yet the thought of really diving into it, seeing my name and avatar next to an un-erasable comment that ranges from insipid to witty and (usually) back again, I get all wiggly and weirded out. I wish I could blog every day about wonderful things, brilliant observations and/or at least cute pictures, but I can't. I've tried. I last for about a week, then I forget my blogger password and retreat into 1990-level web anonymity ( was I once . . . I can be so again!)

If only all my favorite writers, bloggers, and friends all lived here in Boston with me, in the same apartment complex, and we had a giant bulletin board near the laundry room that we just posted cute notes to each other and slipped 3 x 5 note cards under one another's welcome mats and we held big bar-be-ques out in the parking lot every Friday and all went to book signings together and we held writing groups over Skype and pounded on the walls when our Queen music got too loud and, and, and . . . I'd surely be a better, more communicative person then, wouldn't I?

Ah well. Insert brilliant writing advice here.

Insert thought-provoking question here.

Insert amazing links to other amazing writers here.

Insert cute picture of my cat sitting on my laptop here.

Hit publish.

Go watch me some Highlander.

Then brainstorm some more stuff.

No really, go use this thing. Its AWESOME.
(Courtesy of Mr. Andrew Bosley at


C.M. Cowen said...

It is scary how much I identified with that post. There should be an Internet ADD Anonymous group. But it would have to be online...and we'd all only show up once cuz we found something shinier to surf.

We're doomed.

licensed to touch said...

(a note to you on a 3X5 card, slipped under your door)
Hey Tickles,
I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd drop by, but since you're not home...
You mentioned your frustration at getting distracted by so many different things. I just wanted to let you know why this happening. You see the unique and special and intruging when the rest of us see ordinary and mundane. This is what makes you an extraordinary writer. Do a service to the world, friend, and pick up your favorite pen (flip over 3X5 card) and write in your favorite notebook about why these are your favorite and when someting else catches your eye, tell us why that's special too. We NEED your individualistic perspective. How else are we ever to know that that dull metal disc over there is really a priceless 16th century silver coin? Write on, sister. Write on!
Love you bunches,
Venus-goddess of love and beauty

Rebecca Ramsey said...

Great post!
We have so much in common! I feel your pain/joy/ADD!

ju said...

I hereby call for a community bulletin board in the cul-de-sac. Who's with me?

K. Marie Criddle said...

Aw, I love all you guys. Please come live in my commune and we'll get distracted en masse by shiny things.

And we can all steal each other's internet.

Hills' Angels said...

Oh how I've missed reading your blog. I can't understand half of your words, but tis good stuff.

Katrina said...

You are so creative - I love reading your posts. You have a wonderful way with words (I too adore alliteration) :) Hope you & Preston have a great Thanksgiving!!

K. Marie Criddle said...

Katrina, Happy Thanksgiving to you, too! And thanks for reading...I can't wait to see you guys come Christmas!
And Beth, you are too kind. Remember the time we made up words and totally convinced that guy in London that they were real? That was awesome.

Helen said...

Ahh, oooh, madam I concur -- delurking to comment -- now folks "this is big". Also disliking social sparkly sites like Fakebook, et al. *sigh* Suppose I must get with the program and update my blog as well. Inspired. Now back to that second draft... thank Hades "there can be only one!" Mister Helen's fav. movie btw.