Friday, January 27, 2012

Revising for the weak minded and easily distracte--SHINY


(Wow. Blogger is fighting me on fixing the resolution for this particular drawg so please pardon the fuzziness. Pretend you haven't put in your contacts yet.)

20 comments:

Sarah W said...

I haven't put in my contacts, yet. Looks fine to me!

And, oh, yeah, this is familiar! I can't watch Sherlock right before I revise, or my MC goes all stroppy and just a touch sociopathic.

Kristan Hoffman said...

LOL! Love this. Although personally I thought the first version was great. :)

Queen 'Bina said...

I agree with Kristan. Why touch the first draft? Part of revising is knowing when NOT to revise. But I think it was worth it for this drawg. You crack me up!

K. Marie Criddle said...

Sarah - Woohoo! Pre-LASIK buddies 4eva! Strangely enough, I'm watching Sherlock (the BBC one, right?) AT THIS VERY MOMENT. I haven't the heart to watch the Reichenbach one yet, though. Meep.

Kristan - Ha! Thanks! To be honest, only the first revision actually happened and it ended up shifting back to a version very similar to the first. With jetpacks. (Okay, maybe not. But I make no promises.)

Bina - Hee hee...that's so true, though. I can get seriously carried away with my pretty editing pens. Thank goodness for crit partners!

Charles Eubanks said...

I see your problem here. It's just impossible to revise when every version is FULL OF AWESOME.

Read it aloud to Carolee, who also loved it! Andy wandered in at the tail end and asked, "What's a Frito?" (Parenting high five!)

Yvette said...

Sooo obsessed with Downton Abbey right now! Sigh!

Sarah W said...

Marie: The Reichenbach episode is pure evil done very, very well.

Taryn Tyler said...

DOWNTON ABBEY! OMG DOWNTON ABBEY! DOWNTONE ABBEY!!

Two days until Sunday *squeal*

ehem. Sorry got a little distracted there. But you should go with that draft (the one with the crumpets and talk of dashingness). Or better yet, write a seperate version of the book for every draft. They would all be awsome!

B/J Thompson said...

I haven't seen a "Raaarrr"...in ages! Love it!

Peggy Eddleman said...

This was HILARIOUS! If I'd have been drinking something when I read "chaotic neutral," it would be spewed all over my screen right now. Thank heavens I was too lazy to go refill my drink! Oh, my gosh. Have you seen THE GAMERS: DORKNESS RISING?

K. Marie Criddle said...

Charles - Aw, you're too kind. And HOORAY for Andy not knowing what a frito is!! I wish I could say the same for my daughter...at least she can't SAY it yet, though!

Yvette - Isn't it just amazing?? When I grow up, I want to be Maggie Smith.

Sarah - I've just heard it'll shake your faith in good and holy things. I'm a little nervous.

Taryn - Squee! Awww, and I have to wait until MONDAY morning! Boo time zones!

BJ - Yeah, I just had to throw him in there!

Peggy - Ha! Yay for lack of drinks! And I've never seen GAMERS...but I just looked it up and found it on the production company's website. Saturday night movie! (whether Preston likes it or not!)

Adam Heine said...

Macaroon crumbs. Classic.

You should just watch Firefly ALL THE TIME. Then everything you revise will be AWESOME.

K. Marie Criddle said...

But I can't channel Whedon! He'll make me kill everyone I actually like!!

Adam Heine said...

Hm, that's a good point...

gbulson said...

ooh ooh, I want to try:

Corporate Version:

Kelly came into my office, "The meeting was great. You should have come. Thomas was there and his presentation was great."

I pretending to be busy by opening a browser but ended up running a search on Dashing Thomas. I would have gone to the meeting but his new secreatry would have been playing footsie with him under the table.

"I was busy with these quartly projections"

Kelly looked at my keyboard covered in Frito dust, "Oh I'm sure"

Heimlich Version
Kelly jerked her fists against my diaphragm, weeping, and yelling, "Why couldn't you have just come to the party, if you wanted to see Thomas?"

Of course I was in no position to have any conscious thoughts at that moment.

My head seemed to shake back and forth though as if to imply no I had a lot to do here. Really important stuff.

A strong squeeze and the Frito dislodged itself from my windpipe and flew across the room.

K. Marie Criddle said...

OH MY GOSH. I'm dying here. Geoff, these are by far the greatest pieces of Corporate and Heimlich Fiction I have ever read in my ENTIRE LIFE. I would give you all my fritos if you'd write an entire book for me.

Keriann Greaney Martin said...

OMGOSH, you just KILL me!! This is so freaking awesome. I can't even stand it. *falls down*

And yes, your crit partners are waiting! I can't even remember the last time I laid eyes on five pages of pure Criddle. WANT. NEED.

Girl Friday said...

Haha brilliant. My worst was when I was watching a lot of Dexter and also reading the Mr Ripley books. I don't think my psycopathic middle grade novel will be a big seller...

K. Marie Criddle said...

Ha! Oh, Keri, you are the BEST. Trust me, the next wave of Criddle is coming at you soon (I hope)! And fingers crossed that I'll get some Keriann goodness back over the pond (wink wink nudge nudge hint hint.)

And GF - Oh my gosh, that's hilarious! I would SO totally read that book. I'm just saying.

Jenny Phresh said...

Your drawings are so delightful I wish to eat them. nom nom nom. With a side of Fritos, and a cake with the face of that praying mantis embedded in it. Oh, and a plastic unicorn on top of the cake with a saddle and bridle made out of FRITOS.